Lying to the Dentist
Plus a review of airport drinking fountains.
Have you ever misunderstood what someone said and — instead of asking for further clarification — simply responded “yes”?
That’s how I started lying to the dentist.
It was 8am on a subzero Minneapolis morning and the “water instrument” was firing away at the gaps between my teeth. Doctor Fredrickson wanted to know where I lived and I didn’t want to get into the details. Not like this.
I did sorta live in Minneapolis, but in an AirBnB with just two weeks to spare. I could tell he was imagining our future together. One filled with crowns, root canals, and high-fluoride prescription toothpaste. I couldn’t bring myself to share the truth: that our budding doctor / patient relationship may only be short term.
This is a very long winded way of saying I was briefly in Minneapolis to celebrate the 4th of July with family and pay a visit to said dentist. This time Dr. F wanted to know how I planned to spend my summer in the Midwest and I didn’t have a coherent answer.
“Hiking”, I said.
I spent the holiday weekend at our family cabin in Wisconsin. Activities included eating pasta salad, drinking Coconut LaCroix, dressing up as the bassist from 80s rock band DEVO, and kayaking through lily pads in the rain. It was a nice time.
The cabin has a giant cork wall full of old family photos. Here’s one of me driving a boat:
Definitely lucky to have a space like this.
Prior to Minneapolis, I spent a week in San Francisco meeting new teammates IRL. I’m happy to report that everyone is 3D in real life, not just avatars in zoom cyberspace.
I was honored to receive the prestigious award for “Most Likely to Have a Cool Side Project”. I’m told my now-defunct YouTube channel campingwithcory is what sealed the nomination.
Back in Brooklyn, I’m looking forward to soaking up all the heat and humidity July has to offer. Summer is my favorite season in New York. There’s a special energy and smell in the air here this time of year.
Out of every airport on my three-legged journey, Minneapolis was the only one with a fully functional water filter. SFO’s light was flashing red. And JFK’s fountain was so nasty I was expecting a siren to go off mid-fill.
My next dentist visit is on the books for January 6th 2023 and my web of lies is only growing larger.
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